Ko: The God of Mundane Words

11Ko’s title is something of a bit of misunderstanding on mortals’ part on what exactly he does. Ko doesn’t mind that languages get a little bit creative and expressive. In fact he is all for it. Mortals need to go over the top every now and then, and having words that express those absurdities is perfectly okay.

What Ko does is make sure that languages don’t get so bogged down by flowery words that it takes half an hour just to say “Hello”. That is Ko’s job and it’s a good thing too because otherwise everything that I have written so far would fit around roughly twenty three hardcover volumes. Think about it – we just love to make our words as superfluously complicated as possible. Especially the “nobles”. Oh, do they ever love it. If they have a chance to turn a simple word into one bogged down in consonants they will take it.

The question is, how does Ko make sure we don’t turn our languages into a useless pile of dreck? The answer is through suggestion. The elements of Ko will just ever so slightly suggest that maybe that word is a little bit too long. It doesn’t work all the time, it doesn’t work some of the time, but it does work most of the time and that is good enough for Ko.

Many who are unfamiliar with Ko are curious about why the God is depicted with a crimson robe and beard. The answer is because they absorb all of his tendencies to make his words flowery, over the top, or just being longer than absolutely necessary. As a result his voice is very monotone and it is rare for him to say a word that is beyond a few consonants. His realm is a mansion that would be considered beautiful if it weren’t for everything be a color of plain gray.